Most people think they do, only because they press “play” each morning, unconsciously, and they automatically step into the role/mode of their automated, subconscious memory.
It’s easy for these people to assume that I am “weird” or to be afraid of me or reject me. We all do that when we’re in automated mode! It gives us the assurance of knowing, even if this “knowing” is merely our perception, which is filtered to suit our survival needs/instincts.
The reality is that I can’t even catch myself somewhere to pin me down! No one can really, but that's the greatest underlying fear....
People often feel that I am opposing them, when I am
actually opposing their perceived “truth”. As I often do mine!
Opposition is just a stage of doubt to a constructed reality; a disagreement, a rethinking, a disobedience, a non-participation, which can easily be mistaken for self-rejection in another; as we are subconsciously taught throughout our schooling and upbringing in society. The very reason that we perceive any authority as truth, any controlling power that condemns, as justice.
The paradox in this; our current evolutionary step, is that
unless you identify with something, embody it, you are unable to understand it,
know it.
The temptation is to consider this (any) embodiment as an “end”;
a final resting/deliverance place or an eternal sentence/condemnation.
Identifying with/attaching to something, can eat you up and destroy you. It can also
deprive you of precious experience just the same. To do both simultaneously, is unknown to the
linear mind that wants to choose.
When one sees a completed piece of artwork, the masterful strokes
that formed it, the agonizing gaps in between them, the layers of painting, the
static moments where the hand doesn't hold the brush, which seem endless, are not seen.
We like/need to contract a life into a time lapse, but which
we don't realize we are making up.
More and more I am reminded of such in-between moments...as suppression of natural law continues to violate and hide truth (which is never an opinion).
Raising children is much more challenging than we have ever imagined it to be. Even in all the isolation, the violence, the abuse inflicted on us, from 2015 till today, I’m still learning from the ten years that I was consciously raising a free child.
I’m now wise enough to know that NO advice, NO rules, NO set boundaries can make this journey, that we take together, easier. On the contrary! All this makes it even harder, darker, denser, as our attention is tempted in the wrong directions.
The same is true for our own journey of raising our self; unschooling, unporgramming, uncaging, unlimiting our self. NO rules apply to all of us, no set commands, teachings or methods can apply to all of us.
Yet, raising our self is a prerequisite to raise free children. Unschooling our self is a personal journey. Uncaging our minds and hearts is our greatest challenge, as long as children exist and come into this world .And then, molded, seperate roles become so blended: artists, scientists, teachers, students, mentors, healers etc merge more than they parade separately.
The toughest thing for most people to realize is that their perception was wrong. It seemed so real at the time... But admitting the wrong is just a first step of fixing, curing, freeing, healing... Not an end!
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